Monday, October 29, 2012

Wapner Pt. 2

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WELL, this woman was a little nuts.  But not in a terrible way.  But she was definitely overtly SEXUAL, in that it just didn't matter that she was slamming her giant breasts into me in the most overtly PUSHY manner I'd ever experienced - EVER!  I MEAN, HONESTLY. 
I've had a lot of haircuts, mostly by women.   And sometimes you get a little  tit-nudge here or there but this woman was OUT OF CONTROL, so I never forgot her!  She was a character, and she had a big story about her goal being to be ON JUDGE WAPNER and THE PEOPLE'S COURT.  You don't forget somebody like that. 
Plus, she gave me a singularly shitty haircut so I never forgot that, either.

ANYWAY….FAST-FORWARD 3 YEARS….

Me and my husband, Chris, are out on Long Island taking a vacation weekend.  We're in a bar/restaurant, and for some strange reason we start talking about odd semi-sexual experiences.  And I remember this haircut broad.  So I tell him about it:

Me: "This broad was DRAPING her tits on, me, man.  Like - VERY forward.  But her MAIN THING was that she was gonna get on JUDGE WAPNER and sue her boss."

Chris is joyously intrigued:  "Really? She was ALL OVER YOU?  And she was REALLY VOLUPTUOUS…?"

And can you believe this.  At THAT MOMENT…the T.V. SET that's OVER THE BAR JUST BEHIND OUR HEADS is blasting…and THERE SHE IS!

At THAT VERY MOMENT - THREE YEARS LATER - AS I AM TELLING CHRIS THIS STORY - HERE IS THIS WOMAN - ON JUDGE WAPNER - THE PEOPLE'S COURT - SUING THE WOMAN SHE SAID SHE WAS GOIN TO SUE.     She is living the dream.   And I am there to witness it.

We sat watching the show, our mouths hanging open.

Wapner seemed to really like her:  She won the case.

But, Holy SHIT....
Life.
 
 

 

 

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